Lizzie

Now dat its gettin closer to my delivery date, i’m feeling even more impatient about it! I can juz pray and hope dat everything will turn out fine and well. I pray dat i could go thru a normal delivery. Next mon will be one of my last gynae check-up before my actual dd. My gynae will need to do a scan to see if my placenta has gone up or if its still at the bottom. If its still low, most prob i will have to go thru a c-section delivery. Gosh! I pray hard dat its gone up. The placenta can’t come out before the baby, if its going to happen dat way, its gonna cause a danger to the baby. Dats y they will need to get the baby out before the placenta, and the only way is thru caesarean. I could feel dat my baby has turned and though her movements are much slower now, she’s still moving around quite a lot. And its starting to hurt now when she kicks or moves around. I’m feelin heavier day by day. But i still walk around quite a lot. Its juz dat my back and feet will be killing me at the end of the day when i reached home. But i’ll still be contented coz it means dat my shopping list for the baby’s arrival is gettin smaller. I’ve got most of the things prepared oready. Only left a few things to get. Nino’s mum got us the baby cot together with the bedding set. Mama is gonna get for us the event bottle steriliser and warmer. And my dad, we wanted to ask him for a car seat but we’re afraid dat he might not get us the car seat dat we want. So its better if he juz gives us cash…hehehe. Nino’s sis did ask us wat we wanted and she said dat her budget was around $200, but now dat dier dah ‘terpeleut’ again, we oso not hoping for anything from her. Kak noni oready told us dat she’ll be gettin us the playpen. The other things dat we might have left out nino will get it. I’ve got most of the basic things oready like the clothings, toiletries, bottles and foodware, swaddle wrap, mittens and booties, caps, diapers and loads of other necessary things. The only important thing dat we’re left to get is the baby bath tub. Others like the pram, walker and blah blah can be later ah. No need to prepare so soon. Nino’s mum insisted dat the baby sleeps in her room. Hai! kalau tak kasi wait she merajuk, so anything lah. Its juz dat we were thinking dat its not very convenient for her when the baby wakes up for feeding or something in the middle of the night. Well since she insisted oready, there’s nothing we can do about it. Oh yeah, we’ve heard news dat our house in ponggol will be ready by end of next year instead of 2009! So hopefully its true, juz can’t wait to get our own place though financially it’ll be tougher. Don’t get me wrong, its nice to stay wif my in-laws, its juz dat u have more privacy staying on ur own. Its always nice to have a place you can call your own. K lah peeps, will inform you guys once anythin is up again aite. Ciaos!

Ohmigosh! I’m gettin’ heavier day by day…i totally can’t cross ma legs now coz its swollen to the max! and i can’t bend down to pick somethin’ up coz my bump is gettin’ in the way. I feel so restricted in almost all my movements. My back is killing me at times when getting up and lying down…Ishk! I feel so irritated! Like can’t wait to give birth and to get it over and done wif! But of course, i pray dat my baby will be in its full term when it decides to come out later lah…still have got loadsa things to buy before the baby’s arrival. I dun think i would want ma mum-in-law to get us the baby’s stuffs coz if not the whole side of the family will be kecoh! me and nino would rather avoid such things from happening. We appreciate her gd intensions though. I’ve still got 16 days of leave to clear for this year, will be taking it on the last 2 wks of november. Then back to work for 1 more mth..before starting to take ma maternity leave. 4 whole months of maternity leave! Yahoo!!! Confirmed after dat, malas nak balik kerje..but cannot! Must! Have to come back to work! Coz money is good! yeah good money!!! Muahaha…mcm org giler! K lah goin’ for ma lunch soon…

Yup! I went for my last check up and did the FA scan thingy and as the gynae put it.."its 99% confirmed dat its a gurl!" She’s fine alhamdulillah despite the chix pox, fever, stomach flu and all sorts of illness dat i had for the first few months! From the scan she seems orite no visible signs of anythin to be alarmed of..hopefully she’ll be healthy and perfect. Insyallah..Amin. Now dat i noe its a gurl, me and nino have start looking at baby gurl’s names. Some i lurve the meaning but it doesn’t sound so good. Some i like the sound of it but the meaning is like crap! Can’t realie decide now..when the time gets closer than i’ll be more decisive abt it. Oh but nino has oready choosen a name for her…’misha aqilah’ wakakaka…feelin’ misha omar kape…misha means beautiful, and aqilah means intelligent..so we’re hoping dat our lil’ princess will be of beauty and brains : ) insyallah..but i still have not decided on my choice of name yet. We’ll c how it goes lah…still kinda early for me to be deciding on names now. Anywaes, the moment i got to noe the sex of the baby..dats it mann! I went on a shoppin rampage..muahaha bought loads of tiny pinky stuffs. I’m buying her stuffs bit by bit so dat my pocket won’t feel so strained later on…actualie wat rubbish, it doesn’t make any difference coz i’m lucky to have a mother-in-law dat is so excited to splurge her money onto her grand-daughter. (Save duit aku..kherkeke..terrible lah!) She’s put aside an amount to receive her ‘cucu’…cribs, bedding and baju will be provided. But of course i’m not gonna take advantage of it lah..wateva i can afford to spent on, i’ll buy it myself lah. Anywaes, she’s gonna be the first great grand daughter, grand daughter, grand niece and niece for my side of the family. So trust me she’s gonna be pampered to the max! She’s got loads of funky aunts and kewl uncles to pamper her. She’s gonna be one funky trendy lil’ chick! Muahaha…i can juz imagine. Oh yeah, my baby fasted for the first 4 days of ramadan…but can’t tahan after dat coz she kept on kicking me until she got no energy to do so..and she became very quiet..it kinda got me worried so i decided dat ok lah…we fast on weekends je lah…hehe. Can’t wait to ’see’ her again on my next check up!   

Initially i was kinda worried dat my stomach is not as big as some pregnant women who’s in the same trimester as moi. As i read up my pregnancy book, i realised that during the first pregnancy, ur stomach will be much smaller comparing it to ur second or third pregnancy. I’m always paranoid abt my bb being small for her term…I also received quite a number of comments on how small my stomach is. Anywaes, i can’t wait to go for my nxt gynae appt on the 25th. Like so long like dat. I’ve already told nino to take time off and come to the scanning wif me. Will hav to remind him again…dat one ah hav to give him ginko nuts! Very forgetful! Its almost 4 times dat he reached werk in the morning and he realised dat his shift was actually at nite!Dah kena balik rumah…hahaha. I’ve been missing him a lot lately, coz he’s always coming back late..n by the time he reached hm i’ll be like snoring my head off! Wakakaka… btw i snore real bad ever since i got pregnant..n according to nino aka  Mr. Ginko Nut (muahaha) my snoring is gettin’ from bad to worst! Now, i kept ‘mengigau’ almost every nite! I will start to cry in my sleep and ther’s dis one nite wen i elbowed him in the face! Kherkekeke…so funny! Last few days, he got freaked out wen it seemed like i was talking to someone in my sleep. He hav dis tot dat if someone ‘mengigau’ in the middle of the nite, it means dat ther’s some paranomal activity goin’ on ard dat person…merepek only u noe dat one. Dat was why it freaked him out…now he’s no longer freaked out but fed-up coz it’ll b disturbing his sleep. But almost all of ma dreams r so ridiculously merepek to the max! xcept for the one dat i dreamt of rini giving birth to a beautiful bb gurl. Check dis out!…in my dream, i was receiving her bb. So the nxt mornin’ wen i woke up i informed her abt my dream and she went like ‘eh, dun scare me ah, i’m LATE u noe!’ n the following nite she called me to say dat it was positive! Dat was freakin’ true mann! Oh yeah and i dreamt dat my bb is a boy and dat as soon as he’s out, he was already circumcised! Wakaka. So many weird dreams! Btw hav been very bz lately coz of the embassy’s involvement wif the IMF thingy. A whole big grp of delegation frm Turkey juz came down today..and the nxt batch will be dis wkend. Hopefully dey won’t call me to be a ‘tourist guide’ to the wives, secretary, mistress (hehehe) and children of the delegates. Nino will be werking late again 2nite so i’ll be bored to death at hm as usual…oritoes, burritos, cherrios, nachos, tacos, jubos, berambos…hehehe ciao!

Hey peeps! I finally changed my gynae. Dr Yong from SGH. She’s realie very nice. Its the first time that a doctor actualie greeted me wif so much warmth and went like ‘its very nice to meet u, suliana..’ while shaking my hands. It kinda amused me a lil coz i nvr saw dat coming..heh! and during the checks, she was very gentle and polite apologising for having to touch my tender breast..muahahaha! Anywaes, she saw my pox marks and asked me if it was recent and i said yeah when i was about 12-13wks pregnant. She assured me not to worry and dat she will get me to do a detailed scan of my baby juz to ensure dat he’s physically alrite. Even her nurse is very nice, she asked me if i was working and whether or not i needed mc for the day. Too bad, i’ve taken one day leave dat day…if i had known i cld have safe my leave for puasa mth or raya. Anywaes its done and over wif. She quickly booked an appointment for me to get the FA scan thingy done but unfortunately it was packed so we decided dat it’ll be done on my nxt appt as i will be 6 mths den and we shld be able to findout for the baby’s sex as well. Its so xciting, i can’t wait to find out if my baby is a boy or gurl coz i’m getting mixed reactions from pple ard me. Its like almost half said its a gurl and the other half said dat its a boy. I juz wanna noe wat’s my baby’s sex is so dat i can start buying all the cute baby’s stuffs bit by bit. My nxt appt will be on a monday, 25 Sept. So no worries, i’ll keep all of ya informed abt ma pregnancy aite! Most important, i pray hard dat my baby is fine and perfect. I find dat i’m paying lesser for better service. During my appt @ nuh, my gynae juz said dat she cldn’t do anything much wen she found out dat i kena chix pox as it won’t be visible during the scan. She didn’t even inform me dat there is such thing as a detailed scan where you can actualie see your baby’s features like eg. his nose, his mouth, his lips. If i had known earlier, i cld have save myself a whole lotsa moni. Opps! ok not myself but nino’s moni..hehe. Well dey even served everyone waiting in the O&G clinic apples! Gd rite..its like those big, juicy, crunchy apples y’all. Paid more than half of the price at nuh and didn’t even get any xtra treatment watsoeva. Oh yeah one more thing, I juz realised dat my due date is either gonna be on chinese new years eve or on chinese new year itself, so i realie hope dat my gynae will be available to deliver my baby if it were to come out as dued. And hopefully my baby won’t look cina..muahahaha astarghfirullah halaz’im…ishk! ishk! ishk! I wish for my baby’s eyes to follow nino, lips a bit of mine and a bit of nino’s coz mines too thin and nino’s kinda thick…wakaka. Oh yeah rambut confirm hancur! Terpaksa lah have to send for rebonding..muahahaha. K lah me gtg now coz dah time nak cabut!!! 

Overeacting. Dats the thing dat runs in the blood of my family members. Me and me siblings got it from me mum. Lyds, litot, ad, mimi, ika and me! all 6 of us…hahaha. Another thing dat also runs in the blood is eczema!Not all of us actualie got it though. Mama, lyds and me..everytime kena. Oh well ther’s no escaping it coz its hereditary so hav got to live wif it for the rest of ur entire lives. Ok ok fine pple! I noe dat i kinda overeacted about my image thingy, and were feelin’ all so depressed about it. Its not like i could control it during dat time u noe…After hearing most of ur comments on it, and after giving myself some time to breathe and think well, ok i did overeact and dat i shld not be so hard on myself and learn how to take things on a lighter side. Thnx y’all for all the cheer up msgs. I missed nino…however there’s this other thing dat runs in the blood its Egomania!…hahahaha but we can never stay angry at each other for long coz we need each other to survive..no i mean it literally. Oh yeah btw me, lyds and tot we caught dis shahruh khan new movie at GV yishun last friday and it was gd man! I missed the guy. Ok dis is the first time for all the 3 of us to catch a hindustan movie at the cinema. We had forgotten to bring tissues. I had one left and lyds was using the serviette which was meant for the nachos..muahaha and poor tot didn’t hav any. So juz imagine, by the end of the movie, mine was realie totally soaked up wif tears and falling apart, lyds as well and yup for tot her eye make-up had run. Muahahaha. After dat we had prata for supper at the coffee shop at yishun. I’ve been ther many times but dat was the first time i had prata ther and i didn’t know dat it tasted so good! It was crispy on the outside but yet soft on the inside. Yummz! Anywaes, it was a nice sisterly outing which we’ve not had for quite sometime due to each others bz schedule. ‘It was fun yeah babes, oh btw Tot thnx to you dat must be like the shortest time dat i’ve ever finished dat amt of ice-cream.’ Btw i’ll be going for my check-up dis fri…i’ve decided to change my gynae. I’ll be going together wif rini, the gynae is recommended by rini’s sis-in-law. Good and affordable at SGH. Means dat we both will be having the same gynae..hehehe. Hopefully i’ll be able to see my baby’s sex sn! So xciting! My baby’s been ultra active lately…mayb bcoz he/she cld feel my emotions. My baby muz be thinkin’ ohmigosh am i gonna be as paranoid as dat!. I’m looking at names now. But i kept lookin for a boy’s name more than a girl’s. Is dat a sign i dunno..but i did dream dat i gave birth to a baby boy though. But some said it cld be the opp of wat u dreamt. The other day, while nino was bz finding for his ciggies, i asked him wat name he wld want if the baby’s a boy ..at the same time i asked him must u smoke? and he went like ‘i must smoke’ ‘i must smoke’ and den he went like ‘Ah! i noe if its a boy i’ll name him ‘musmoke’. Wat a freak rite?! Dats my husband..nino! Wokays its 5.20 pm oready..i’m gonna get ready to pack ma stuffs and cabut!!!

I’m realie gettin all so emo! and i’m realie losing control of it. Eva since i got pregnant, i’m like extra, ultra sensitive! I seemed to be upset wif comments that i cld take last time. I’m much weaker now. Pple around me might find dat i’m juz being ridiculous or ngada-ngada but realie i feel one kind of upset feelin’ deep inside. No one cld understand me now not even nino! He said dat i was juz being merepek. I feel so ugly and short and fat! and  i feel like i’m some kinda makcik2 or an auntie2 walking ard wif my flip-flops and my ugly maternity baju. My face, my arms, my legs basically every part of my body is like bloated up! My hair is always tied up coz i’m always feeling warm nowadays. To make matters worst, when i was on the way to werk one day, dis ‘mat’ was calling me and so i turned and he asked,"auntie, how to go to aia building ah?" i got so damn upset the whole day! and i tried to brush it aside and said to myself nevermind, its only gonna be for a few more mths and aft the baby is born, u can work to get back to a slender shape. And tonite it happened again, dis pakcik dat used to be nino’s old neighbour was like asking me my age and before i cld answer, he went like 31? Do i realie look 5 years my age?!!! being 1 or 2 is like ok..but dis is like 5 yrs older man! I juz smiled and said my age is 27 and he went like ‘oh’. So on the way back i asked nino i’m so upset dat the pakcik guessed my age as 31. And he’s reply was like yeah u do look old wat?!!!! Can u imagine how i felt! And to make matters worst, i asked him again baby do i realie look like 31? And he went like yeah you look like 31 wif a straight face and i knew dat he was not joking. When he saw me being upset, he tried to pujuk me by saying dat he was joking, but i noe dat he meant it and i noe wen he’s serious and wen he’s joking. Den he thinks dat i was juz being petty and got upset wif me for being upset wif him. I noe dat he tried to pujuk me and layan me after a long day at werk, but the thing is i’m juz so affected by it and especially at this stage dat i am, i tot he wld understand my feelings better. I juz find it so hard to control my emo! pple at my werk face said dat my face is so big and rounded now. To make matters even worst, i kena chix pox like 1 mth ago and have ugly pox marks on my face and my whole entire body. Its still ther and still very obvious and it doesn’t even look like its dissapearing! I’ve heard so many unpleasant comments and its realie driving me mentally nuts! especially when i see so many other pregnant woman who still looks good being pregnant! My self confidence is like at possibly the lowest eva. I do miss nino but now dat he’s pissed at me, its better if i juz be by myself.

The day i found out that i’m pregnant was like dis… i tot i had like the most terrible gastric ever and i decided to go to the doc. So she asked the usual questions and touched my stomach a bit here and ther. Then she finds dat something is amiss so she asked me, "when was ur last menses?" and i said it was 12 April. The date was 17 May. She gasped and then exclaimed, "Uhh! you are late!" you could be pregnant. And i was like what?! no..no…however she insisted dat i got myself a test kit at the pharmacy nearby and do it myself coz she explains that its more sensitive and almost accurate. If i want it done at the clinic, i wld have to come back a week later coz i was only like 4-5 days late. Theirs are not that sensitive. So she didn’t dare to prescribe me any med for she already took it dat i was pregnant! I decided to get the test kit but i kept it for about 2 days before testing it out. Dat nite, I had to cover my ambassador’s pa duties coz she was on a 2 wks vacation in Turkey, so I had a function dat i gotta attend which i can’t avoid and it ends at ard 10.30 p.m. I was dead beat and tired and my stomach was realie not feeling good. Took a cab home and me mum-in-law is asleep and nino was not at home. Working late again. Went in the kitchen, drank some water and brought the test kit in the toilet…Shld i wait for nino? Decided to call him..He was excited and asked me to wait for him while he’ll try to rush home. Waited a lil while for him till abt 11.30 p.m. still not back yet…Now i needed to pee, so again went in the toilet with the test kit. Wat the heck! Juz do it…Wif only one drop! and almost in a blink of an eye i saw one red line and not expecting for the second red line, i turned for the small piece of paper wif the instructions on it and as soon as i turn back…2 RED LINES!!!! I was speechless and i juz drop on the toilet bowl seat. It took me a few mins to register in my head dat i have a foetus in my stomach. Shit! can’t fag..ther goes my trip which was supposed to be nxt mth. I realie felt faint and felt like puking! I managed to get myself out of the toilet and rested on my bed.I didn’t expect it to be this soon.First called nino and he exclaimed for joy den i msged, lyds and tot. Den rini, busu and nona. I did felt kinda selfish juz thinking about myself. Shld i be happy? I guess i wasn’t prepared to be a mum yet. Aft dat all the aches and pains dat comes for the nxt few wks was realie a test for me..the bloatedness, the nausea, the aches was terrible and i was told dat it’ll get worst when the baby grows bigger. Went for my first scanning at nuh, my gynae was recommended by my ambassador…she’s a proffessor and a senior consultant! Yeap! Very the ex! When the first time i saw ma baby thru the scan, i swear i juz teared! I started to feel dat it is indeed a gift from the Almighty and i’m glad dat we were blessed. My only concern now is for my baby to be normal and healthy. We both dun realie care wat the baby’s sex is. Now i’m 17 wks pregnant and i realie need to change gynae coz we realie can’t afford paying minimum $150 per appt. And the appt is every 3 wks mind u! So i need to change gynae fast. Holy crap! its only 4.30 p.m! still got one and a half hr more to kayuh…aiyoh!!!!

Wokays! Reason y i’ve started to create meself a blog is coz i’m bored to death and i have no one to talk to. Not realie no one to talk to lah its juz dat i’m staying wif ma in-laws while waiting for the keys to my new hse in punggol. My mum-in-law is nice but usually on wkdays she’ll be sleepin’ early coz she will have to wake up at 4 am to prepare for ‘jualan’. She’s selling at a school canteen, so dats y she’ll be tired almost everytime she comes back hm. Besides her, me father-in-law drives the cab at nite, even if he’s around i wld not wanna talk to him! hahaha…Den left ma ‘gila’ husband. Muahaha..ok lah though he can be ‘gila2′ and ‘buang terbiat’ at times, its realie fun when he’s around. Without him the hse will be very quiet and dull. Then comes the two spoilt cats! Komeng and feather. Ok weird names i noe but i didn’t named them…hahaha I’m all alone now coz my hardworking husband is like working 24/7! U see i came from the hse of rock..haha ok imagine this, 8 kecoh pple under one roof parents and 6 children..yup dats ma family. So used to the loud and noisy atmosphere at home and so used to sharing room wif 2 of ma sis. All of a sudden i find myself sleeping by myself regularly wen ma husband has got to work the whole entire nite till nxt mornin’! The first few nites sleepin’ by myself, i wld on all the lights which is the main light, side lights and table lamps. Dats not all, I wld oso on the tv, and radio. And all windows closed and curtains drawn. hahaha..oh yeah the tv channel wld be channel news asia coz once i tuned in to channel 5 and they had the stoopid incredible tales advertisement late at nite..den when i changed to suria, and dey had the stoopid dimensi ke-4 ad! Arghhhh! Buat org seram je. Oh yeah, me side table will have the ya’sin booklet..Hahahah. Now i’m gettin’ used to the loneliness and silence. Now not so bad, i only sleep with one of my table lamp on. Everything else off. I hate it when nino had to work late!!! But when he’s around i always get irritated wif him…hahaha coz he’ll be disturbing me like a lil small brat! Ok lah kinda sleepy..I think i’ll go to bed first…